Get your Rocks Off people!

There seems to have been quite the splurge on arse related posts recently, butt (yep, did it again) I’m enjoying myself so let’s keep it going!


I have long been a fan of the Lovehoney Basics Slimline Butt Buddy Butt Plug. I’d like to meet the person responsible for naming that one!

It’s a great starting point; slim, soft, flexible, cheap, no phthalates. Lovely stuff.


Recently, I’ve been craving a little more in that area so have branched out and bought the Rocks Off Assberries Raspberry. Again, I need to go for drinks with the people that name this stuff!

The Raspberry

Rocks Off produces some great stuff, it’s all waterproof and is designed, tested and produced in the UK. They use platinum grade silicone and their toys are some of the softest I’ve ever touched.

The Raspberry itself is thicker than the Slimline plug and comes with a removable 80mm bullet – great for making sure it’s perfectly clean after a fun session.

Scale 2

Scale 3







Scale 1

I had gone through a phase of pressing a bullet against the base of the Slimline plug to provide vibrations but, if playing solo, you very quickly run out of hands! The Raspberry circumvents this leaving both hands free to play with all manner of other things *exercise your own imagination here*.

After a while with a pretty small plug the change was noticeable and took a little adjusting to. I would never be without my trusty lube (this one, if you’re interested) which is essential for all fun, safe backdoor play.


The vibrations come in a variety of speed and pulse settings and I’m having a wonderful time exploring them all. The neck also has a pleasing diameter to provide just enough of a stretch.

I think this is a great toy for a semi-beginner looking to step up the sensations but at the same time it also has enough ‘zing’ for the more experienced out there. All in all, a great toy.


Anal Beads

The subject of anal is, admittedly, not scholarly dinner conversation but I believe it to be a great topic nonetheless.

I’ll happily be the first to say: I quite like something in my butt.

Sometimes, I think people are a little ashamed to say it, just imagine if there was a support group… At your first time attending AA (Anal Aficionados, obviously), someone stands up and says “Hi everyone, my name’s Jane and I love a cock in my arse”. The group then applauds and a beautiful evening is had by all.

Butt (aren’t I witty?) back to the matter in hand.

Anal beads.

There is an astonishing selection on the market at the moment and one I have been trialling recently is the LoveHoney Beginners Anal Beads.

Anal Beads

For a beginner string they’re longer than I expected with a full 11 inches of insertable length. The beads themselves are graduated from 3/8ths of an inch to 1 inch. Given I think that’s quite hard to get a sense of, I’ve popped a 50p next to the smallest and largest beads.

Anal Bead Sizing

They are made from skin safe jelly rubber and are waterproof too. As I’d expect, there is no latex or nasty phthalates. If you’re wondering why we don’t want phthalates near our nether regions, go check out this post by She Bop.

There are many things you can do with a string of anal beads however one of the most written about is inserting the string then pulling it out at the moment of orgasm. Naturally the use of lubricant and never double dipping should go without saying but if you need reminding go check out this previous post.

All I’ll say (as you might be eating right now) is that if you’re going to be inserting that much into your arse, dear GOD make sure you douche thoroughly first. Luckily I was using them solo when I realised this. Thank. Fuck. The shape of the beads is (unfortunately) particularly conducive to pulling out any little spec of fecal matter that might be around. Not exactly arousing. Unless you’re into that sort of thing…

A normal douche (like this one) is fine for basic play but in truth doesn’t reach that far up so for the more thorough among you, there are kits more like an enema than a douche – I’ve not tried this one but you get the idea!

I think for me the fear or the string being pulled out with any… additions negates any pleasure gained during their use. Everyone is different but I like my anal toys short and thick!


Ben Wa Balls…

We’ve all read 50 Shades of Grey. Don’t deny it.


Yes, the written English is awful.

Yes, it makes me want to work in a hardware store.

Yes, it made me buy a ridiculous number of accessories.


One of which was….. *drum roll* …… Ben Wa Balls.

(See what I did there?)


According to the Wiki page, the official definition is that they are “small, marble-sized balls, usually hollow and containing a small weight, that roll around and are used for sexual stimulation”.


LoveHoney have gone one step further and named their variety Oriental Ben Wa Jiggle Balls. Jiggle. Great word. Roll it around a little, jiiiiigle. Lovely.

Ben Wa Balls


Quite a number of the reviews mentioned wearing these whilst walking around, either in the house or out and about, rather than in the throes of passion therefore this is where I started.

In short, they do nothing for me. I could only feel them when I bent over and after about 10 minutes they had shifted down and started to peek out. Not particularly arousing.


Following that test (as this is totally scientific) I had them in whilst masturbating.

As before, I couldn’t really feel them. If I jumped up and down (again, not particularly arousing) I could feel the inner balls moving but not in a way that was going to make my night a screamer.

I did try to focus when I came, I promise, and at that point I could feel the balls. With each ripple of pleasure I could tell they were there but they didn’t make the sensations better, if anything, they were a little uncomfortable.


On a logistical/hygienic note, the indentations make the balls incredibly hard to clean thoroughly which, as we all know, is an absolute necessity for toys. I had to enlist the help of a spare (and now disposed of) toothbrush to get into the little gaps and even when using that the cleaning took some time.


Every person reacts differently to a sex toy and for some, I’m sure these balls are the bee’s knees (either from a sexual or toning point of view). For me, they don’t bring anything new, different or enhancing to my sex life and therefore do not deserve a place in my naughty draw.





The Inflatable Vibrating Butt Plug…

As the title suggests, this is my review of the Inflatable Vibrating Butt Plug.

‘What is it?’ I hear you ask, well… it’s a butt plug, which inflates, and vibrates. Obv.

I first tried this butt plug about 2 years ago, back in the day when anal exploration (the true final frontier) was a reasonably new concept for me.

At this point I need to create a warning for those that are just starting out with anal play – this toy will not be your friend!

Having something up your butt is kinky and naughty but it also feels so good. Whether it’s a little finger, a large plug or a nice string of beads, the sensations change everything about sex and masturbation, but the rules are there for a reason:

  • Always use lube (this one by Maximus is particularly good)
  • Start small and build up
  • Never ignore pain

I would have said this toy should come third or fourth in your journey thought the glorious and diverse world of butt plugs. As a beginner it was particularly difficult to cope with the size, rigidity, inflatable-ness and vibratey-ness (totally real words) all in one go.

Someone once said you should try something three times before deciding you don’t like it, so with that spirit in mind I revisited the toy and BOY have things changed!

I still find it a little too rigid for my taste – I prefer a softer plug, but the vibrations…. Oh. Em. Gee.

When in its normal form, the vibrations extend right the way down the plug, when inflated they concentrate around the neck. Going from inflated to normal (at the flick of a very handy quick release button) is a sensation like no other.

The vibrations vary from very gentle to really strong, giving you the option to start slow and teasing or really go for it depending on your mood.

It does look a little intimidating, but if you can get beyond that, lube yourself up and you’ll have a rocking time!