Bad Blow Job Behaviour

Blow jobs, doing a Lewinski, giving a mouth hug, going down, giving head, sucking dick, lip locking the love muscle… I could go on but I think you get the crux of my subject matter.

I thought I would share a recent experience as I’m curious to find out if anyone else has encountered something similar.

We’re in bed together, kissing, touching; fairly standard. He’s pretty twitchy, almost to the point of mini spasms. It’s a little off-putting but I just exercise a reasonable amount of care so I don’t bite off one of his balls – a pretty substantial mood killer.

When I’m deep throating he puts his hands either side of my head and does what I can only describe as ‘fucking my mouth’… I had heard about guys being this rude before but until that day I had never encountered it myself.

He also insisted in thrusting to his own (frankly rubbish) rhythm. It put me off my stride, so then he thrusted more, so I couldn’t get back into my rhythm and the cycle continued. I ended up having to stop, then he would stop, then I could get back to it.

This random thrusting also led to the third issue: in a normal situation, I know where the dick is, I know where my teeth are and I know where my mouth is going. With this guy I had to constantly cap my teeth so I didn’t catch him during his random thrusts and spasms and I ended up having cuts on the underside of my top lip.

Sufficed to say, we have not seen each other since.

In this situation it was an easy option – don’t see him again. However if you wanted to try and continue a relationship with a guy that behaved like this (apart from needing a head CT) my question is this: how do you go about changing such behaviour?


p.s Since starting to talk to people about this I am amassing a staggering collection of oral sex stories, I shall collate and publish them at a later date so let me know yours!

Play outside the box…

I have spent the last 4 glorious weeks abroad, sunning and drinking myself silly. Now, considerably heavier with a pickled liver and peeling skin, I am back to London and the demoralising yet beautiful clouds it has to offer.

The progress on the fuck buddy front has been pretty non-existent so I’ve given myself over to sampling a lovely variety of toys.

Once I find a toy I like, I’m faithful. I am every retailer’s dream – if you please me I will keep coming and coming… back to your shop that is.

The same applies in restaurants: I want to be adventurous, I want to try something new, I want to order that because I’ve no idea what half the ingredients are and yet, I don’t.

Why would I order that and risk not liking it when I can have this and know I’ll be satisfied at the end?

Sticking with what you know is a good theory; arguably Darwinian.

Playing it safe might save you from disappointment, but it might stop you getting something incredible. Cro-Magnon Man took a brave step out of the cave and look where humans are now, walking on the motherfucking moon and growing an ear on a person’s forehead!

Play with fire and you might get burnt, but equally you might just manage to roast a fluffy marshmallow.

This principle holds true with everything, from food, sex, fashion and even love.

So, to the crux of this post: I am going to set aside my faithful LoveHoney Rabbit, this one, in case you were curious, and sample some new and exotic pleasures.

First up, the Sqweel 2!