Liquid Lapdance… yes. Really.

Strip clubs, love them or hate them I don’t think they’re going anywhere any time soon. Now, there is something new for the, ahem, *gentlemen* that frequent these places to have an even better time!

Liquid lapdance

This is, in my little opinion, one of the sleaziest things to be invented for men in quite some time…

Put simply, they’re boxers with lube in them to make a lapdance feel better – we all know a good bit of lube makes things feel gooood so what’s the sleazy part? Their marketing…

“She dances on him for what seems like hours…  He’s been at the edge of orgasm for the last few songs…  He grabs her hips and thrusts upward a few times… The orgasm is long and intense… After six or seven intense spasms, she’s drained every drop of cum from his cock… He doesn’t worry about a cum stain or wet spot in his pants… He doesn’t worry about ANYTHING.  He kept it fun and safe and legal.  Even if his wife finds out, it’s not that big a deal.”

One of their product testimonials actually went like this…. “I wouldn’t say it felt like sex.  More like a blow job, a hand job, whacking off, anal sex, and titty-fucking all in one.”

Clearly, some men are easily pleased.

There is also a ‘stealth mode’ to hide them from a wife or girlfriend, disguising the ‘product’ as “European Penis Bath”… I could NOT make this shit up! The ‘penis bath’ is described as a “rejuvenating scrub to leave your penis more soft, more beautiful for her”

Priced at $19.95 for one (thankfully) disposable pair, they’re not exactly cheap, especially once you price up the cost of entry, drinks and the dance itself… One does have to wonder if it’s actually worth it…

The ‘Bro Bible’ have done a handy collation of product marketing and testimonials which you can find, if you really want to, here.

A word of warning, when they say the video is NSFW, they REALLY mean it.


6 thoughts on “Liquid Lapdance… yes. Really.

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